Parents of Moms
We are here to help you and your daughter through this difficult time based on our experience with other parents who have “been down this road”. We anticipate the thoughts that may be on your mind, and how you may be feeling toward your daughter – feelings of anger, hurt, or shame – be assured you are reacting quite normally. Almost everyone faced with this circumstance feels exactly the same, at first.
We believe that it helps to know that these feelings will pass in a very short time. We know that you love your daughter and want to do everything in your power to help her through this time and ease her burden, despite the negative feelings you may have now. Be encouraged so you are able to help her build a new life for herself. She needs your support now more than ever.
Members of our staff have had considerable experience in understanding and helping young women, just like your daughter. Solutions to her difficulties will be found with help. She will be referred for medical care to ensure a safe and healthy delivery. She will also receive free, professional counseling on planning for her future and the future of her baby, and on any worries that may be of concern to her. If needed, she will be referred to any appropriate agencies for additional services. After exploring the pros and cons of parenting her baby or placing the baby for adoption, she alone will make the final decision about what is best for the baby and herself. All options will be presented to her with complete confidentiality and with loving concern.
Your understanding in this traumatic situation is of utmost importance to your dauther. Be assured that the heartaches that all of you are experiencing will fade away with time. Please know we are here for you and that you are in our thoughts and prayers.
The board, staff and volunteers of Lois’ Lodge
How 2 Love your Pregnant Teen
She’s pregnant. You’re shocked.
Here are some guidelines by Focus on the Family to help you through this unexpected time of confusion and heartache.
When your daughter first breaks the news to you,
You may feel:
You may think:
- “Her life is shattered. Our lives are ruined.”
- “All of her (and our!) hope, dreams and plans are threatened.”
It’s not good news. It’s also not the end of the world. Remember to:
- Stay calm.
- Avoid assigning blame or condemning.
- Focus on the positive. (She could have chose abortion.)
- Show grace and mercy as Jesus would (even when it is the toughest!)
Step Into Her Shoes
Understand her fears. She is probably overwhelmed.
- Feeling like she has lost your love and confidence.
- Feeling alone and needing a support team.
- Wondering what her options are.
- Facing a future she hadn’t planned.
Be an asset to your daughter by:
- Reassuring her of your unconditional love and confidence.
- Affirming your confidence in her.
- Trusting God wholeheartedly.
Simply Say It
She can’t read your mind. You need to speak the words.
- “I still love you. No matter what..”
- “I’m here for you and will help you in whatever way I can.”
- “You do have options.” (marriage, adoption, single-parenting, evening college courses, etc.)
- “Some people will look down on you. Many others will extend their compassion”.
- “You are ultimately accountable to God, not to people.”
- “You will have a whole lifetime ahead of you. This one mistake doesn’t need to destroy your
- bright future.”